Sometimes people get confused with BDSM. I am a Mistress and you may be a sub/slave or whatever. If you visit me, I will listen to what you want from a session in the meet and greet room and do my best to reflect this during your session. BDSM is not just about me doing whatever I want to you (although this is part of the illusion that is created within our session). It is about mutual reward and enjoyment for both the Top and the bottom (or Mistress and sub in other words) Negotiation and mutual respect are vital parts of BDSM, whether it is within a play session or a full time power exchange relationship.
I have been talking to Cliff James on Twitter (you can check out his excellent spanking website at http://cliffjamesphotography.com/ ) and we are both in agreement that respect. negotiation and R.A.C.K (Risk Aware Consensual Kink) are hugely important in any BDSM activity. I am looking forward to meeting Cliff James soon when I visit London at the end of this month when I am sure we will be discussing such things further.
These days, kink has become more mainstream than ever and it is important that the core values which have helped to make kink safe and fun for many generations, are not forgotten.